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Should you be a different person at work and at home?

Do you sometimes feel like you’ve got a split personality? Like the person you are at work is nothing like the person you are in the rest of your life?

At home, we tend to be more relaxed and informal, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable and open with our loved ones. We may let our guard down and be more expressive, sharing our emotions, opinions, and quirks with those closest to us. We may wear comfortable clothes or even wear our PJs for best part of the day, binge-watch our favorite shows, and indulge in our guilty pleasures without fear of judgment or scrutiny. We are mere mortals who make mistakes and don’t know everything.

At work, we tend to be more professional and formal, putting on a different persona that aligns with our job responsibilities and company culture. We may dress up in business attire – our power suit, use professional and more formal language and tone, and focus on our work tasks and objectives.

We may hide our personal quirks, emotions, and opinions, fearing that they may be perceived as unprofessional or irrelevant. Making mistakes is not allowed and we need to have all the answers, men in particular.

How about finding healthy balance between these two personas? Where we can be true to ourselves without compromising our work ethics and values.

“It is our responsibility to act in service of our authentic selves. Sometimes this means giving up the need to please others, giving up our need for others’ approval.”

Edith Eger (The Choice)

Here is our hit-list of 7 tips to express one’s authentic self at work and at home:

  1. Identify your values: Take time to reflect on what’s truly important to you. Understanding your values can help you make decisions that align with your authentic self.
  2. Establish clear boundaries between your personal and professional life, and stick to them; be conscious how you allocate your time, energy. Stick to you values.
  3. Develop a consistent routine: Develop a consistent routine that works for you, where you can balance your personal and professional responsibilities without feeling overwhelmed or burnt out. This may involve setting aside specific times for work, family time, hobbies, and self-care.
  4. Embrace your unique qualities: Embrace your unique qualities and strengths, and use them to your advantage both at home and work. Don’t be afraid to express your opinions, share your interests, and showcase your talents, as long as they align with your professional goals and company culture.Embrace your quirks and differences, as they make you who you are.
  5. Be truthful and honest: Acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses, and be honest with yourself about your thoughts and feelings.
  6. Be mindful of your communication style: and adapt it to your audience and context. Evidently, this differs with different cultures but in the main, be truthful when communicating your thoughts and feelings, and respectful of those of others.
  7. Be kind to yourself: prioritize self-care! Don’t be too hard on yourself when things don’t go as planned. Be kind to yourself and remember that mistakes are a natural part of growth. Make time for activities that help you recharge and relax. This may involve exercise, meditation, reading, or spending time outdoors.
  8. Seek support: Surround yourself with people who accept and support you for who you are. This can help you stay true to yourself and feel more confident in expressing your authentic self.

By identifying one’s values, establishing clear boundaries, and embracing unique qualities, you can express your authentic selves both at home and work, which leads to greater personal satisfaction and overall well-being. This directly results in a sustainable lifestyle as it helps us all find a healthy balance between our personal and professional lives.


This blog is based on the Heartwork newsletter, 20th of November 2022. Would you like to read more inspiring content?

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